so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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