i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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