Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
