I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
