How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
No subtext here. People are naked.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
