think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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