I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
