wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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