fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
