I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
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She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
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You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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