Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Actions speak louder than pants.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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