Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
