hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
