you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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