he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
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Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
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I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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