first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
