I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
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