so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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