dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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