is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
