My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Randomize