I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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