operation harelip BJ is a go
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
