He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
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Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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