oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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