I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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