I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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