Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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