No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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