the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
