those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize