How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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