just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
