When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
