Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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