You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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