bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize