is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Randomize
