i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
