dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize