so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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