so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
