we're blogging at a bar
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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