GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
