I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
