So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
