you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
