Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Randomize
