just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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