honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
