No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
