you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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